What to Say When You Don’t Want to Work with Someone |

Business and Marketing for Massage and Bodywork Therapists

Episode 58.

MINDY TOTTEN: Hey hey there. Welcome back everyone, to the Do It With Intention podcast!

Today we are going to continue our series of what to say during certain difficult or what I'm calling sticky situations. And today's is a doozy. What to say when you really don't want to work with someone.

This episode today deals with. What to say when somebody calls you or contacts you, and you can tell that you really don't want to work with them. We have a whole lesson inside The Bodywork Project on what to do and what to say when you've been working with someone for awhile and you need to gracefully let that client go.

But on today's podcast, we are going to talk about what do you do when in this case let's say somebody calls you and you talk with them for a little bit. Yeah. And you just don't have a good feeling. You just don't want to work with a person. Yikes. What do you say?

Well, the first thing before we get into the actual words to use the first thing, I want to make sure that you're remembering, and I want to emphasize over and over again, is that you are setting up clear boundaries on your call.

And I just did an entire episode on this. So if you haven't listened to that one that's episode 49, and we'll put a link into the show notes for you on that. The show notes are at Mindy totten.com/podcast/episode58 that's today's episode. And we'll put a link in those show notes as to that other podcast episode, in case you missed it on what to say, when somebody calls you to find out more about your services, how to set that up.

So just a really strong boundaries on that very first contact. With a client or potential client. So you've set up those boundaries for the call and you've said something like:

“Hi, Sally, I'm delighted that you contacted me. During this call, we're going to take about 10 minutes to talk together, to see whether [your modality], whatever it is, your modality is a good fit for you. How's that sound?”

She says, “Sounds good!” Then it's question. You always ask the person questions. First. What symptoms are you struggling with? How long has this been bothering you? What else have you tried to ease the pain?

You may know that feel like you're really resonating with this person, and I'm just gonna interject here really quickly. You want to be careful not to just reject people outright because you're feeling, I don't know something's off. Right. I have had some of my most powerful lessons in personal growth, working with people through the years who challenged me or who pushed my buttons in some way.

And if I had just, you know, rejected them right out, I wouldn't have learned those lessons. At the same time. There are times I've had them. You've had them. I know we all have when you're talking to someone and you just know, Nope, your, every siren is going off. Every flags going up, all your warning signals are buzzing.

This is not a good fit. I do not want to work with this person. I don't feel comfortable. I feel perhaps threatened or I feel like this is just. Not going to be beneficial for the client or for me. So then what do you say? Well, here are a couple of things that you can try. First of all, you want to remember to come from integrity and to come from your heart.

So you don't want to make up some random thing, you know, like, Oh, well I would work with you, but I, you know, flying into the Alps this weekend, you don't have to make up a big story having to Heggerty be grounded, come from your heart. And here a couple of ideas for things that you can say, you might try saying, After hearing about your unique situation, Sally, it's my professional opinion that my modality, whatever it is, that craniosacral therapy, the way that I practice it is not going to get you the results you're looking for.

May I suggest. Joe blow who practices, Joe blow modality. So you don't just leave the person here. You can say the word I practice this modality, I don't think is going to be a good fit for you. And that's honest, that's coming from your heart, right? Because you're having all these warning signals go off.

So, you know, you're not going to be able to come from a place of neutral and she's probably not going to get the results that she's looking for really important. then you suggest someone else who she could try. You know, or if you're looking for, you know, this kind of work, you can try such. And so who does this type of modality?

So that's one option. Another option you could say is, after hearing about your unique situation, Sally it's, my professional opinion that the modality might not be a good fit for you, or you could say. No, you could say it could be a good fit for you, but unfortunately I'm not currently accepting new clients.

And that's true because at this moment you're not accepting this new client. So you could say either a, the modality, the way that I practice, it might not be a good fit, or if the modality is a good fit, but I'm not currently accepting new clients. And again, And the discussion with may, I suggest such. And so who practices such.

And so, so that's the second way you can do it. Then the third way is after hearing about your unique situation, Sally, it's my professional opinion that you and I are not going to be a good fit to work together because of, and then to give. And it gave a reason, right? Because for example, I specialize in working with children or I'm not currently accepting new clients looking for somato emotional release or whatever it is.

We're not going to be a good fit together because of the way that I work. May I suggest such. And so who practices such and so modality then, and the call. Thanks again for contacting me, wishing you all the best on your healing journey. Bye it's so, so important to remember what my English teacher used to tell me when I was dealing with high school students and my own boundaries when I was learning classroom management and how to deal with older kids.

He told me no means no period, no means now. So if you use some of these ideas for what to say, and the person says, Oh, no, I really want to come to you because I heard you're so great or whatever, you know, it's going to be all about. Ego and trying to get in and, Oh, you're the only one that can help me.

All of that stuff. Do not ignore your warning signals that they are going crazy. No means no. Oh, but I really wanted to come and see you. I really appreciate. That's very kind, but it's not going to work out at this time. Thank you so much for calling all the best to you. Be a pro, be a CEO, step into your power and.

Be strong kind and come from a place of integrity and you're going to be just fine.